Increasing Authenticity

Increasing Authenticity

Increasing Authenticity

serene confidenceAuthentic people respond to their intrinsic motives. They exercise autonomy, dismiss introjected regulations, and choose among the extrinsic motives available to them. Their thoughts, beliefs, words, and actions originate deep from within and are true and secure enough to resist destructive external pressures. The result is a genuine, quiet, deep, vitalizing, serene, and lasting fulfillment and confidence without anxiety, self-doubt, or other sources of stress.

Authentic people choose authentic alternatives. These include: wisdom, well-founded beliefs, valid conclusions, purposeful actions, candortrust, placing needs ahead of wants, knowing when they haveenough, balancing gratification with hedonism, nimble actions, treating others humanely, and establishing symmetrical relationships. We become authentic when he path we choose through life is congruent with who we are.

The alignment essential to an authentic person is illustrated here. Actions aligned with your authentic self are authentic behaviors. Actions misaligned with your authentic self are alien, false, fake, pretentious,stressful, insincere, fraudulent, strained, bogus, phony, and not authentic. This is typical of a person who is misaligned, off balance, stressed, alienated, detached, and faking it. When what you do is fully aligned with who you are, you are an authentic person. Authentic people “do who they are” and enjoy gratification, serenity, success, and significance. Authentic people act with more interest, excitement, and confidence and often demonstrate better performance, persistence, creativity, vitality, self-esteem, and general well-being. Authenticity reduces fearanxietyguilt, and shame.

increase authenticity

Your authentic self is the unique combination of all your qualities including your skills, abilities, interests, talents, limits, insights, experiences, memories, beliefs, purpose, and wisdom. It is the expression of your core values through all your quirks and your strengths. Our authentic nature may best be revealed by how we enjoy playing—by what it is we most enjoy doing simply for our own pleasure—at any age.

Increase the congruence between what you do, and your goalsbeliefs, and values. Pay attention to how you spend your time. Do the activities you spend your time on advance your most important goals? Do your goals reflect your values? Do your values reflect your authentic self? Reappraise your values, beliefs, goals, and actions to improve the congruence.

As people become more authentic they often become more: rational, realistic, intuitive, creative, independent, flexible, able to manage change, willing to accept blame and correct their mistakes, generous,respectful of others, fair, and cooperative. This congruence earns the trust of others.


Habits For Cultivating Authenticity

Habits For Cultivating Authenticity

Habits For Cultivating Authenticity

When we start the process of “taking back our kingdom”, we face many obstacles to creating a life which truly expresses the unique contribution we have to offer. One of the most frustrating obstacles is that we have many, many habits in place which support our false self. The process of reorganising life from the ground up must include a rebuilding of our unexamined habits. This list, while far from comprehensive, will help you to start this process and keep it on track.

“When you are authentic, you create a certain energy… people want to be around you because you are unique.” – Andie MacDowell

Journal natureThere’s a unique and unmistakable power in knowing, becoming, and being your real self. Those who are truly happy in life understand this power and vehemently stick to their authentic selves.

To be authentic is not to allow a situation or person to change you, unless for the better. Personal authenticity is firmly in place, regardless of who is in your company. Sure, your style of communication and how you present yourself (e.g. formal or informal speech) may change, but not your actual core.

There is undoubtedly an authenticity problem in society, as many of you have likely seen and experienced. For example, one survey found that nearly half of all people feel they need to “fake it” at work (a belief that only adds to an already stressful working environment.) When we walk into a place of business to purchase something, it’s commonplace to experience a sense of doubt about the person doing the selling. “What’s in it for them?” we ask ourselves.


While we may not be able to change someone else’s authenticity, we can certainly change ours. Feeling the need to “put on a mask” is exhausting, stressful, and (often) deceitful. It’s also risky – when people feel uncertain about you, they’re more likely to start distrusting anything you do or say.

To be your authentic self requires honesty, vulnerability, and courage – and it’s also incredibly rewarding.



Jot down what you appreciate and love about yourself, along with what you may need to improve on.Write the names of people you want to spend your time with, and what you’re joyful and passionate about. Breathe this information in, meditate on it, and resolve to be this person. This is the authentic you.



Once you understand and accept your real self, get comfortable with it. Allow self-critical thoughts to naturally dissipate. Forget about comparing yourself to others, including what they may think.


Release any guilt or self-limiting thoughts. The past is the past – it’s over, done. Be in the moment, present, and at peace with your identity. This process may be gradual, and that’s okay. Breathe, be patient, and your real self will eventually surface.


As you begin to make positive changes in your life, people will start to take notice. Most will look at you with admiration and respect – a few may not. Should you become aware of this cynicism, be mindful, and their pessimism, along with any discomfort you may feel, will inevitably disappear.

being yourself


Write down times and places when you felt your authenticity begin to wane – the actions and behaviors (yours and theirs), the situation, your observations, and the outcome. Keep this journal up to date – it will provide valuable insight into certain patterns of thoughts and behavior you may wish to change.


It’s too easy to become lazy and overlook other people – don’t make this mistake. Many people have a valuable lesson to teach if we’d only let them. Don’t underestimate the power of observation. Some of the best lessons may come without a word being uttered.


Giving your full attention to someone else is a remarkably powerful skill. Active listening is a sign of respect and of your true interest in others, which is a gift in itself. However, it also provides: (1) a stronger bond and level of trust with others, and (2) a fantastic opportunity to learn and grow from their knowledge and experiences.


Being your authentic self and living up to your ideals means demonstrating kindness to everyone. Say hello, ask them how they’re doing, and make good eye contact while displaying a genuine smile.


Being authentic also means being comfortable with change. Regardless of the circumstances, remain true to your inner core. Be open to self-improvement as well, as there is nothing more authentic than changing for the better.


You have one precious life to live. Spend it following your passions and your heart. Remember, the only expectations that truly matter are the ones that you set forth. Follow your real expectations by allowing you heart and life’s journey to walk step-in-step.